It's scary, when you realize you are in an abusive relationship. It's scary when you can't seem to pull yourself out. Believe me, I was there. Then there's the big one, I call it the post-crime-scene freeze. You don't know what just happened (A), (B) you don't know where to go, (C) you probably don't even know what you're really doing until 3 months later (if that?!) once a tiny bit of the adrenaline and shock have only finally begun to calm down. There are a myriad of questions that contain a million side-note "but?" 's and "why?" 's. The whole room spins round and round no matter where you are. Nothing seems real. Nothing seems fake. Nothing seems like anything. What's the point?
What. Do. I. Do?
I remember just lying there thinking..."huh?" -- if I even brought myself to think at all, that is -- I had disregarded the police-based victim services card the officer on my case had presented me with. Would the police keep record of absolutely everything I did and said? It didn't matter, I had nothing to hide. But would they forever hold my words against me even into my future? I didn't want that. I didn't want to be another "record."
I never touched that card ever again.
Long story short, what do you do? My Mother was the one who made the phone calls as she watched me in my condition. See, I had support. That is key.
What I ask of you is to comment here with questions seeking answers. For example, who do you call? Or, where can you go? If you are an immigrant seeking help, if you are from out of country visiting...ask all the questions you need answers to. We are currently in the process of building Toolkits that can present you with answers before you ask the questions! While we do that, ask us anything. It's ok, we're here for you. You'll remain anonymous when you choose a Username in setting up your profile on here.
If you are in immediate physical danger or fear for your safety CALL 9-1-1.
If you are not in immediate physical danger, but still need help and need to know the first next steps, call Victim Link BC at 1-800-563-0808.
Need a place to go if you fear for your safety and are experiencing abuse?
Check out http://www.sheltersafe.ca.
Let's get the conversation going! Talk to us!